such a long weekend

friday was a birthday dinner for my roommate and then saturday was a concert at disneyland which was interesting and then gospel sing and sunday was another concert at a church.
it was weird being on the other side of everything at disneyland. everyone looks so much more unhappy behind stage than they do in disneyland, although we didn't see any characters, only disgruntled looking ride workers.
but we did our concert and that was over pretty quick and then we got to ride on rides until my group left for gospel sing- an event our multi-ethnic offices (or something like that) put on which had some really awesome performers (if you're interested in spoken word check this girl out, she is amazing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjO9NCkTsF8&feature=related )
and then today was our last concert of the weekend at a church about an hour away. it was not terribly exciting especially since i wasn't able to sing cause my voice is shot thanks to this cold so i just sat in the audience but i got some good things planned for our 4 day weekend coming up and spring break in san fran, which is going to be really awesome.
and that's pretty much it.

moving forward

january is almost over.
my south africa application for next fall is turned in.
everyone should take sociology.
and i still need to finish my homework.

rain rain rain

southern california is soggy.
classes are really picking up speed now as we actually start to do things. academic things. i don't think any of them will be too bad. none of them seem really hard and the work load is basically non-existent for a couple of them (i mean there's reading, but who does that?)
my favorite so far is probably pottery- i had taken a couple of classes at the community center a couple of years ago and it's funny what comes back to you. it's certainly easier to pick up when you have a little background.
i just love the dirt- clay is clean dirt, it washes out of your clothes and has a chalky smell.
i have it at the end of a really long day and it's nice just to be able to not think and squish dirt into something useful and hopefully, eventually, graceful.
the utilitarian part of pottery as an art form is so cool to me.
i love that it's creating something real and useful but potentially beautiful.

just not each other

http://www.mediafire.com/?mjblmhbl4jn
by william fitzsimmons

back

at APU.
it feels like spring here- 73 degrees and it makes me so happy.
i am not a fan of the cold and dark. it makes me want to sleep until it's warm again.
i am probably part bear.
there is so much stuff to do and everyone's running around trying to get stuff figured out. i've only been to one class so far, public com, but my teacher seems very nice and public speaking is not really something i've ever had a problem with, so it should go well.
tomorrow will be my hell day- i have no time for meals and my ceramics teacher has already sent me a few scary emails :/
so we'll see how that goes. there's a possibility that i may be in intro to art 101 tomorrow, but i'm going to give threatening woman a chance before i change anything.
it's great to see everybody again- and just to be around people all the time. i really don't want to live in the suburbs- just too much isolation. i didn't realize how much i missed being around the people here until we were all back again. this is just as much my home now as atlanta is- probably even more so. i've realized that i am very comfortable here- not in a complacent way, but it feels like home.

this is adorable

2010

"not knowing when the dawn will come I open every door"
emily dickinson

the cold

crystalizes moments

and this is how i feel.

last year in french

we had to answer each other's questions during a conversing exercise and someone's question was
"would you rather be a celebrity or a monk?"
and the older i get the more i know i would choose monk if i was ever seriously asked that question.
there is something so beautiful about a life spent in contemplative communion with God.
i know that you don't have to be a monk to live like that, but it seems like a really good excuse to just sit around talking to God all the time.

the monastery in Conyers

.....working?

is not how i would describe it really.
it was so pointless being open today. i sat here for like an hour and then 4 people came in so now i can't watch arrested development :/

anyways, now that i'm done whining about having a job and making monies which a lot of people would love right now, i'll talk about the new year.
kinda.
resolutions don't work for me. if i need to change usually i realize it at some really inopportune moment and then i just change. waiting for some magic day when i'll suddenly feel more motivated is not a good platform for change for me, but i understand the custom, and lord knows i'm all for people evaluating their lives and thinking about what they are actually doing for once.

it's funny to think about how far we've come, this time last year seniors, so ready to get out high school. and now, i spent my summer in Europe, i've lived in LA half the year, and next year if everything goes as planned, i'll be spending my fall and winter in South Africa.

that's probably been my favorite part of having conversations with people at home- or people anywhere really, hearing about future plans.
you get a great picture of a person's heart when you hear their vision for what the world will be like- for them, for others.
it's just fun to have conversations where you get to see people lit on fire for what they believe in- people seeking something bigger than themselves and really living.

seeking something real. i figure life is too short and filled with too many moments that have too much potential to do anything that just wastes time and leaves nothing behind.