Saturday, October 30, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
we have it so good
i met about 7 teenagers today that have lost their parents to AIDS and are raising their younger siblings, going to school, keeping up the house, and trying to figure themselves out.
i held so many kids that see more hurt and neglect at home then love.
i tried to talk to children that have spent most of their lives ignored. they just stared out at me from deep eyes.
i was so blessed and these children will continue to bless and teach me more then i can even imagine at this point, but i started to learn the depth of my ignorance and the privilege of my circumstance a little better today.
i held so many kids that see more hurt and neglect at home then love.
i tried to talk to children that have spent most of their lives ignored. they just stared out at me from deep eyes.
i was so blessed and these children will continue to bless and teach me more then i can even imagine at this point, but i started to learn the depth of my ignorance and the privilege of my circumstance a little better today.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Jehovah-Jireh
A woman came and spoke in chapel yesterday who grew up in Rwanda and made it through the Rwandan genocide. Her stories from the genocide were heartbreaking. People being killed viciously for no reason and the reality of terror in everyday life. Her family was rich so they were able to pay people off for a while, but when they ran out of money the fled to the congo where they were refugees. In congo she met her husband and they started a family together but while she was pregnant with her second child the government started threatening her husband and he had to flee. Not knowing where he went she waited until she couldn't wait any longer and she set out to find him herself. She traveled on foot through Tanzania, Zambia, Mozambique, and Zimbabwe searching for her husband. She finally arrived in South Africa after hearing there were a lot of Congolese in Pietermaritzburg and there she finally found him. And her story didn't get any easier after that- she had her second child then had to get a difficult job walking around the city selling coffee and baked goods because her husband couldn't find work. But after she would detail some struggle she would say, "but Christ was with me."
The theme of her life has been relying on the providence of God and not just relying on it, but reveling in it. She has seen and lived harder things then i could ever imagine and she has had nothing, but she has had everything because she has loved and relied on Jehovah-Jireh- God the provider.
"Sing to the LORD, for he has done glorious things; let this be known to all the world."
Isaiah 12:5
The theme of her life has been relying on the providence of God and not just relying on it, but reveling in it. She has seen and lived harder things then i could ever imagine and she has had nothing, but she has had everything because she has loved and relied on Jehovah-Jireh- God the provider.
"Sing to the LORD, for he has done glorious things; let this be known to all the world."
Isaiah 12:5
Friday, October 22, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
take 40 mins
and listen to "Engage the Lost" and let God wreck your heart for His purpose for this world and our role in that.
your kingdom come, your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
http://www.brookhills.org/media/series/global-gospel/
your kingdom come, your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
http://www.brookhills.org/media/series/global-gospel/
"Engrave this upon your heart: there isn’t anyone you couldn’t love once you heard their story."
Mary Lou Kownacki
http://www.mediafire.com/?o4iee2837zf7jt7
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
the holy spirit
today at church the sermon was on physical manifestations of the holy spirit which is something that i have experienced in my life and the lives of others but it isn't something we talk about really so i think it was a step in a really positive direction.
the pastor spoke about 1 Corinthians 12 where it talks about spiritual gifts and even though the bible doesn't say much about physical manifestations of the holy spirit the pastor drew a lot of great parallels between the counsel concerning spiritual gifts and the physical evidence of the holy spirit we were talking about. He had a number of members of the congregation get up and talk about experiencing the presence of God and what that is like for them and there were people that said that they remained unmoved and there was a women that started laughing as she was speaking because she was so touched with the spirit.
the most pivotal point the pastor made was that the evidence of the holy spirit is not in the signs we see or experience but in whether or not Christ is being exalted. he pulled from the passage to show us that God is concerned with the heart. God doesn't care whether or not you shake or laugh or cry or even feel his presence tangibly- He cares that your heart is seeking Him.
and i think that was something we all needed to hear. there's been a girl on campus who started speaking in tongues a week ago and a lot of people really didn't know what to make of it and Satan uses that confusion to create fear and tear us from one another and from Christ.
so it was really good for our group to hear, but i think it's important for all believers to know that because they aren't experiencing a gift or physical manifestation of the spirit it doesn't mean that they aren't in the spirit. God made us all unique and the way that we experience Him and His spirit is equally unique so we shouldn't be afraid of these things or let them split us because we have enough to separate the body of Christ without tearing it apart ourselves. and if you're in the body and do experience these things then i think it's important for you to know that you're not alone and that you shouldn't be ashamed of your gifts but that you should exercise them with your brothers and sisters in mind, in a way that won't cause anyone to stumble in fear or confusion.
let's cultivate an environment of freedom and love each other, for it alone covers a multitude of sins.
"It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that's how freedom grows. For everything we know about God's Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That's an act of true freedom."
Galatians 5:13-14
the pastor spoke about 1 Corinthians 12 where it talks about spiritual gifts and even though the bible doesn't say much about physical manifestations of the holy spirit the pastor drew a lot of great parallels between the counsel concerning spiritual gifts and the physical evidence of the holy spirit we were talking about. He had a number of members of the congregation get up and talk about experiencing the presence of God and what that is like for them and there were people that said that they remained unmoved and there was a women that started laughing as she was speaking because she was so touched with the spirit.
the most pivotal point the pastor made was that the evidence of the holy spirit is not in the signs we see or experience but in whether or not Christ is being exalted. he pulled from the passage to show us that God is concerned with the heart. God doesn't care whether or not you shake or laugh or cry or even feel his presence tangibly- He cares that your heart is seeking Him.
and i think that was something we all needed to hear. there's been a girl on campus who started speaking in tongues a week ago and a lot of people really didn't know what to make of it and Satan uses that confusion to create fear and tear us from one another and from Christ.
so it was really good for our group to hear, but i think it's important for all believers to know that because they aren't experiencing a gift or physical manifestation of the spirit it doesn't mean that they aren't in the spirit. God made us all unique and the way that we experience Him and His spirit is equally unique so we shouldn't be afraid of these things or let them split us because we have enough to separate the body of Christ without tearing it apart ourselves. and if you're in the body and do experience these things then i think it's important for you to know that you're not alone and that you shouldn't be ashamed of your gifts but that you should exercise them with your brothers and sisters in mind, in a way that won't cause anyone to stumble in fear or confusion.
let's cultivate an environment of freedom and love each other, for it alone covers a multitude of sins.
"It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that's how freedom grows. For everything we know about God's Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That's an act of true freedom."
Galatians 5:13-14
Saturday, October 16, 2010
"I am a part of all that i have met."
Alfred Lord Tennyson
there are certain places that follow me around, some that i remember, some that catch me by surprise.
i saw a cathedral today when we were in Durban and musing aloud i mentioned that i would like to look at it. adam promptly checked his watched and said that we had enough time and that he would go with me so we quickly crossed the street and figured out how to get inside. the cathedral was surrounded by market stalls and the taxi station- the busiest areas of the city filled with the poorest people and that garbage that surrounds poverty.
so i was caught up in the crowd, swept along and concerned with not losing adam or myself in the crowd and smell and noise that africa creates when she is congested. and i totally forgot to prepare myself for what would happen next. we stepped into the courtyard and the difference was immediately tangible- i could feel the memory creep into the edge of my brain as i looked at the graves and the latin inscriptions. but i was not prepared to enter. as soon as i took the first marble step into the room and looked up my summer in europe smacked me in the face. i stopped. i couldn't walk any further.
i clasped my hands and realized adam was right behind me and mumbling something about knowing this place, this tile, this marble, this soaring vaulted ceiling, i stepped aside.
i can't equate it to anything but the feeling of standing outside of your house, looking in the window after a long time away.
i'd forgotten the quiet of religion that has marched steadily on for centuries, the strength and smooth of stone, the hush of years of reverence, and the calm of dusty saints and careful worship.
there is a cathedral inside of my chest. i'd just forgotten it was there until today.
Alfred Lord Tennyson
there are certain places that follow me around, some that i remember, some that catch me by surprise.
i saw a cathedral today when we were in Durban and musing aloud i mentioned that i would like to look at it. adam promptly checked his watched and said that we had enough time and that he would go with me so we quickly crossed the street and figured out how to get inside. the cathedral was surrounded by market stalls and the taxi station- the busiest areas of the city filled with the poorest people and that garbage that surrounds poverty.
so i was caught up in the crowd, swept along and concerned with not losing adam or myself in the crowd and smell and noise that africa creates when she is congested. and i totally forgot to prepare myself for what would happen next. we stepped into the courtyard and the difference was immediately tangible- i could feel the memory creep into the edge of my brain as i looked at the graves and the latin inscriptions. but i was not prepared to enter. as soon as i took the first marble step into the room and looked up my summer in europe smacked me in the face. i stopped. i couldn't walk any further.
i clasped my hands and realized adam was right behind me and mumbling something about knowing this place, this tile, this marble, this soaring vaulted ceiling, i stepped aside.
i can't equate it to anything but the feeling of standing outside of your house, looking in the window after a long time away.
i'd forgotten the quiet of religion that has marched steadily on for centuries, the strength and smooth of stone, the hush of years of reverence, and the calm of dusty saints and careful worship.
there is a cathedral inside of my chest. i'd just forgotten it was there until today.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
abba, i belong to you
i will never understand how my God holds me when i am frustrated.
when i am undeserving.
when i am wrapped in pride.
when there are walls miles thick that i have put up willingly.
He moves like the wind and whispers to my heart.
Settling me. Calling me by name. Reminding me that it’s okay. That i will be okay. Because I am His.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
having a mary heart
"be mild and cleave to gentle things, they glory and thy happiness be there"
this life is not a race. it is not a contest, it is not a competition.
it is not about grabbing things, getting things, moving things and it is not always about making things happen. which is hard for me.
i like progress, i like to get things done. i get impatient.
but lately God has been telling me over and over that i need to take this slowly and deliberately. grace is not rushed, love is not hurried, and i need to settle into the timing of God and the easy grace that comes with it.
i am enough,
i have enough.
"What i'm trying to do here is get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving... Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out."
Matthew 6:31-33
this life is not a race. it is not a contest, it is not a competition.
it is not about grabbing things, getting things, moving things and it is not always about making things happen. which is hard for me.
i like progress, i like to get things done. i get impatient.
but lately God has been telling me over and over that i need to take this slowly and deliberately. grace is not rushed, love is not hurried, and i need to settle into the timing of God and the easy grace that comes with it.
i am enough,
i have enough.
"What i'm trying to do here is get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving... Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out."
Matthew 6:31-33
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